Lies, Liquor, and Love
by dearjenna
Summary: Takes place during Dead Man's Chest. This is a Swann-and-Sparrow fanfic. Hope you like!
1. Stuck

**Disclaimer: So, this should be obvious since this is , but out of courtesy to the creators/writers, I have to state that I, Jennifer, do not own Pirates of the Caribbean.**

**Author's Note: This is probably not the first of its kind; I realize that. But I love the character of Elizabeth Swann, and of course, I love Captain Jack Sparrow (and the hotness that is Johnny Depp). So, why not make a fanfic with the two of them together? Hope you like it.**

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A salty breeze lifted sails and lifted the crew's spirits, the day was fading into dusk and the Black Pearl was left in the loom of the cloud's shadows, sailing along the sea as graceful as a bird dancing in the air. Elizabeth Swann had been aboard the ship for what seemed an eternity, and though she had grown accustom to a life with the crew and the "captain" Jack Sparrow, she was getting restless. For selfish reasons still unbeknownst to Miss Swann, Sparrow had tricked the young William Turner into boarding the Flying Dutchman--Elizabeth had joined the Pearl's crew again, hoping to get her lover, Will, back. She leaned over the side of the ship and stared at the sky. Footsteps could be heard behind her, approaching in a muddled rhythm. Elizabeth sighed.  
"Don't worry, love," said a rather deep, drunken but steady voice behind her. She relaxed some and watched the sea as he spoke more. "We _will_ get the little lad back so you two can do... Whatever it is you were intending on doing." He said, one hand flailing in the air as he spoke in her ear. He looked down at her waist and placed his hand in her natural curve. Elizabeth jerked around to meet Jack's eyes. He stopped and stared at her with a smirk.  
"We were intending on _marrying_," she said in frustration.  
"I'm sorry," he said, putting the bottle of rum, he had had by his side, to his cheek. "I never meant to belittle anything." After a short hiccup, he attempted to drink from the empty bottle. Thwarted by the never-ending emptiness that seemed to consume the inside of the vial, he threw it behind him, hitting one crew member in his head, and letting it crash to the floor. "Listen," he began; Elizabeth still watched him. "If it were up to me, we would just go to that bloody Dutchman and I would help your bonnie lad escape."  
"Then why don't you?"  
"It's not quite that simple," he moved in closer to her, and she could not move anywhere, stuck between his body and the side of the ship. "See, the Flying Dutchman is a gambler--it is _kinda_ what he is known for." His face was dangerously close to hers.  
"So..?" she grabbed his arm that still rested on her side. He looked down and the smirk faded. His free hand began flailing around as he spoke, fighting back a burp.  
"So..." he thought for a moment. "We have to haggle with the whole lot o' 'em."  
"Why can't you just be a pirate and fight him!"  
"Because you cannot win with the Flying Dutchman, love." Jack said and stared into her eyes.

Elizabeth stared at the being for a moment, but felt as though all hope was lost. She pulled away and sat down on some steps. "What is a good bargaining tool, then, Captain?" she asked. He walked over and sat down next to her, handing her a bottle of rum that was in the clutches of a sleeping crew-member. "Bottoms, up, love," he said and watched her as she examined the bottle and then took a large drink. "A fair bargain would be some sort of treasure... After all, what pirate doesn't love treasure?" His eyes were glazed over and he stared at Elizabeth, his face close to her neck as she sat up slightly higher than he and continued to drink the rum. "But of course, being that we are dealing with some of the most gruesome pirates of all the seas," his eyes closed in on hers and she stared at him, tipsy, "We need to find something better than treasure."  
"And what is better than treasure?" she said after a small hiccup. "Rum?"  
"Nah, goes straigh' through 'em!" He moved his fingers down her arm and stared at her body. "Besides, I wouldn't give up me rum for anything in this world."  
Elizabeth laughed and jerked away. "Nothing on this earth is better than rum?"  
"Nuffin," he said, smirking.  
"Well, what about the love of another?" she said smiling and moving in closer to him. His eyes deepened and he smiled sinisterly. _I've got him._ "Aye," he whispered. Their faces were nearly an inch apart, and Jack could not look away from her soft lips. Elizabeth placed her hand on his face, but before skin was able meld, the ship rocked and Jack ran over to Mr. Gibbs, who had been steering in his place. "What is that racket, Mr. Gibbs?!"  
"Aye, sir; I'm not so sure!"  
"Well, get sure, Gibby, lad!"  
"Aye, aye, Cap'n Sparrow!"

The ship rocked back and forth and Elizabeth sat, unmoved, on the steps, finishing off the bottle of rum. She laughed to herself, feeling triumphant. "Pirates," she sighed as she rolled her eyes. Gibbs looked down at the crew and tried to shout through the wind and noise, but was unsuccessful. Cotton's parrot was frantically flying around, followed closely by the tongue less Cotton who ran after him, jumping in the air like a circus act. Marty was trapped in an intense game of tug-of-war with Pintel over the sails' ropes. Ragetti attempted to be the peacemaker, only to lose his dirty glass eye in the process, sending him downstairs to catch it. Jack Sparrow ran around everyone and found Elizabeth still in the same spot. "Did you drink the rum?" he asked, as though he were breaking out in hives. Swann tossed the bottle behind her and the hollow shatter made Jack cringe. "Why is the rum gone?" he said arms flailing through the wind. The Black Pearl took another blow to the side. Ragetti was adjusting his glass eye and coming up the stairs, but as Jack was fervently racing back to Joshamee Gibbs, he tripped over the pirate's head. Face wedged in between the cracks of the deck floor, Cotton assisted his drunk captain back to his feet. "Thanks, Cotton," he said, and the other saluted and continued chasing after his parrot who kept squawking, "Fire!"

Making his way to Mr. Gibbs he asked once more what the commotion was. "Somethin' is hittin' us from the eas,' Sparrow!"  
"The east?" Jack repeated, slightly confused. He walked over to the east side of the ship and could see a ship, half a mile away, firing at the Black Pearl. "Not me Pearl," Jack muttered and his eyes darkened. "Cap'n?" Gibbs called from the wheel. Jack turned around slowly and looked at Gibbs sinisterly, "If it's a fight they want, it's a fight they'll get."  
"Aye!" Gibbs agreed. Captain Jack Sparrow began walking along the deck, calling down to all quarters and crannies of the ship, his orders to his men. Closing in on the Pearl, was a British ship that had been spotted several times at Port Royal, and aboard this mighty ship, with several cannons all in a row, was none other than Lord Cutler Beckett. Elizabeth walked over to Jack who put an arm around her shoulder. "That, m'dear," he began, pointing to the ship, "is our newest target. Are you ready?"  
"Sure, Jack." Elizabeth said with a stern face. "Tell me what I should do."  
"Gather the men at the Pearl's cannons," he said deeply, and she did as told yelling at the crew, she assisted Marty with one and they began firing back at the ship. Lord Beckett and a few men climbed onto a dingy, and floated their way to the Black Pearl as the fire had finally ceased. Pintel and Ragetti assisted in lifting them onto the ship. Jack strutted over to Beckett, followed shortly by Elizabeth. "Captain Jack Sparrow." Beckett addressed him slowly. "Well, well, well, the governor has been looking for his daughter, you know."  
"Aye! At that I am sure, mate. But I have some unfinished business with a certain someone that involves this certain someone that is standing by all these some ones here on this, my ship, the Pearl. Savvy?" Jack said, the buzz from the rum actually wearing off. Lord Beckett examined the crew, Miss Swann, and the captain, his face overcastted with disgust. "Sure, whatever, Sparrow. But the governor has requested that I retrieve his daughter."  
"Well, I'm not going," Elizabeth spoke out. "I'm with him," she said, standing beside Jack. Sparrow looked around at his crew and then looked back at Beckett, eyes wide. He cleared his throat. "Yes! You cannot retrieve said daughter, because this daughter is also the love of a lad we are trying to save and if we do not save him, she will never see him again... Think, Lord Beckett." Jack said walking towards Cutler, taking the lord's hat off and examining it. "You don't want to be the one to break up a love, do you?" Beckett was angry and Jack gave him back his hat cautiously. Beckett snatched it out of his hand. "Nice hat, mate," Jack added quickly.  
"Yes," Beckett said, aggravation swelling red in his eyes, "I don't really care about their love. Last time I heard, Turner is stuck on the Flying Dutchman; no one returns from such a fate as that." He and his men had a good laugh.  
"I'm sorry, Cutler, but you are wasting my time, mate. We have things we have to do and people we have to see, and swiftly at that--I'm afraid you are going to have to leave now." Jack retorted.  
"Oh is that so?"  
"Yes, it is." Jack smirked.  
"You'll have to force us off."  
"As you wish, Lord Becket," Jack said and smiled at Gibbs. All of the Pearl's crew then took to pushing all the men off of the ship and into the water, each man landing, one by one, into the cool sea. Dusk was finally wrapping its arms in its rough embrace. The men began swimming and Beckett was more infuriated than before. "You'll regret this, Sparrow!" Water spewed from his mouth.  
"Make me regret it, next time, Beckett," Jack challenged with satisfied eyes, and Cotton dropped the dingy down below. "Fire!" Shouted Cotton's parrot and Beckett's men jumped. Jack's crew laughed heartily and watched as the men climbed atop the dingy and rowed their way back to their ship. The crew cheered and Elizabeth and Jack hugged. Realizing what she was doing, Elizabeth ripped out of his arms and attempted looking casual, hoping the hug went unnoticed. Jack smirked at her, "You know you want it."  
"In your dreams, Jack!"  
"That it is, love. That it is."

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**Author's Note: Leave me reviews, please!**


	2. You Can't Be Trusted

**Author's Note: I have finally given an update. I am sorry it took so long. If it weren't 2:25 AM, I would totally update Dastan in Wonderland, but I am going to try and finish my one-shot for _Coraline _and that will be it for tonight. Tomorrow is a brand new day. You never know how much I will update. I might even update The Only One He Ever Feared, He Loved. Yay!**

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The crew had been aboard the Black Pearl for two months now, and Elizabeth was the only member of the vessel not experiencing withdrawals from the lack of rum. Pintel and Ragetti thought it clever to do some fishing for food, but Ragetti quickly resented the idea the moment Pintel realized that his pal's eye made for a fantastic lure. The two bickered as they continued to lift nets full of small fish. "It's my eye and I believe I shoul' 'ave the right to how it is used," Ragetti argued.  
"And I think you are a bloody fool! The crew needs the food, an' I'm givin' it to 'em whether you like it or not."  
"Well, fine. I won't 'ave any part of it."

Elizabeth sat in the brig, miserable. It seemed that Jack was encountering the worst case of withdrawal among any of the crew, and decided that because he had appointed the girl Keeper of the Drink, it was her fault that the rum was gone, the food was sparse, and birds were playing keep-away with his hat. What Sparrow did not know was he never gave Miss Swann that title, the rum and food was gone because the crew feasted after their victory over Lord Beckett, and he was the only one that could see the birds. "Bloody pirates!" She fell to the floor and sprawled her legs and arms in front of her." Locking me in the brig!" Elizabeth kicked aside a nearby empty crate and a bottle of rum rolled out from underneath. "I'll show them!" She quickly guzzled the bottle down, and the effects hit her with the strength of ten men. She passed out with bottle still in hand and was soothed by boots stomping above on deck.

Above the brig, several men were climbing over one another as Pintel brought out the fish. "Hold your horses, men! We 'ave to cook it firs'!" The crowd cheered. The Captain and Gibbs pushed through the crew and made way to the front. "Well done, gentlemen! I must say you have almost given yourselves the titles of Official Fishermen of Fishes," Jack said dazedly. Gibbs looked confused.  
"Isn't that what fishermen are? They fish for… fish?"  
"Precisely why they would deserve the title," Jack said as he patted Pintel on the back.  
"What did you use for bait?" Gibbs asked. Ragetti appeared from behind a nearby mast, cleaning off his eye and placing it back in his head. "Oh," he said, somewhat disgusted. "Well, never you mind. How are we going to cook these wonderful trophies?"  
"Uh…" Pintel had yet to think of that.  
"I know how," Ragetti said. "I know how to build a fire pit."  
"We're on a wooden ship," Pintel said in a reprimanding tone. The crew looked disappointed.  
"I know that," Ragetti argued. "But we 'ave some things down in the brig that will hold the fire in its place."  
"Well, to the brig!" Jack shouted and threw his arms in the air as he began to scurry to the cell. The crew followed.

Halfway down the stairs, Jack fell as he furiously swatted at the air. "No! No! Get away, beasts! Back!" He rolled across the floor, hitting Miss Swann's cell. "Jack! Jack!" Gibbs called to him. He and Marty rushed over and pulled him off the ground. "What's wrong with you, Sparrow?"  
"The birds! The birds!"  
"Bloody hell, there are no birds, Cap'n!" Gibbs said ripping away from the man. Jack looked at him shocked. "No birds?"  
"No birds."  
"Well, of course there are no birds, Gibbs. What's the matter with you, anyway?" He stood up and dusted himself off. "Marty?"  
"Aye, Cap'n?"  
"Thank you for helping me up."  
"Aye."  
"Now, crawl your small self into that cell and wake the lass up."  
"Finally lettin' her free?" Lejon asked, disbelieving.  
"Well, we do need her help if we wanna' cook somethin'." The crew laughed at Jack's crude joke. Marty took no time at all to climb into the cell and place a hand on the woman's face. "Wake up, darlin'," he said, snickering. Elizabeth opened her eyes and made contact with his. Screaming, she jumped up from her place and dropped the empty bottle on Marty's head. "Ow! That hurt!"  
"G'mornin', puppet," Pintel said with a smirk.  
"What do all of you want? I was trying to get some sleep!"  
"We need your 'elp," replied Ragetti.  
"Oh, you do, do you?"  
"Yes, see, we need help making a fire pit and you happen to be in the cell with the things we need," Jack said, looking up as though he had confused himself somehow. Elizabeth walked over to the bars and looked at Jack. "Persuade me," she smirked. The crew snickered. Marty crawled through the bars and back to Lejon. "Who do ya' think will win, mate?" He asked, pulling out two shillings.  
"I bet three shillings that she could take 'im." Lejon laughed. Gibbs grabbed the cupronickel coins from their hands. "An' I bet you two better stop bettin' away your money 'fore they'll be none left," he scolded. The two crew members hung their heads. Marty attempted to snatch the coins back from him, but Gibbs held his fist high above the pirate's head. "C'mon!" the little pirate whined.

Jack was staring at Elizabeth with his usual devious smirk. "I think if I were on the other side of these bars, love, I wouldn't have to do much," he said.  
"You do think a lot of yourself," Elizabeth smiled.  
"That I do." Jack moved away from the bars and Elizabeth could still not stop smiling. "Now, I will let you out of there, if you help us with our feast."  
"What do you want me to do?" she asked unbelieving it would be an easy task.  
"Cook!" He threw his hands in the air as though it were obvious.  
"What?"  
"What, what? Do you not know how?"  
"I might know a little, but not much! I am the governor's daughter."  
"Aye. 'Spare the rod, spoil the child,' eh?" Jack chuckled.  
"How dare you?" Elizabeth stamped. She turned to Pintel and Ragetti. "Let me out!"  
"Sorry. We mean no disrespec' at all. But we can' go against the Cap'n."  
"Fine!" She walked back over to Jack and held onto the bars before her for support. He smiled.  
"You know, you aren't doing a good job of persuading."  
"Right you are, dear. How 'bout, I cook, but you help me gut the lil' buggers." Jack smiled at Elizabeth and grabbed her hands, holding them tightly around the bars. Elizabeth looked down and smirked. Shaking her head so her hair moves out of her face she moved in closer. "Fine. We'll work together."  
"If you so wish, love," Jack laughed. "Togever it is. All my men: hoist our food into the galley. Miss Swann and I will do the rest." He opened the cell. "After you," he said, holding out his arm. She took it and walked out in a prideful manner—head high, hand gingerly holding onto the captain's arm.

In the cramped galley, Jack and Elizabeth sat on the same side of the table. His back was to the hard wood as he began to work on getting the old stove to actually function as it should. Elizabeth turned to him. "What's wrong?"  
"I think we are going to need that fire pit after all."  
"Isn't cooking what a galley is for?" she asked condescendingly.  
"Usually." Jack looked at it with his lip curled and two fingers scratching his temple. Like a caveman, he began poking and prodding at the pot with one long finger. Elizabeth giggled. "What?" Jack said smiling.  
"You're so odd."  
"Well, I know that!" He laughed as well. "Go get the eye man."  
"You'll have to get Ragetti yourself, I'm gutting fish."  
"Wouldn't you rather get him?"  
"Let me guess, you don't want to go out there?"  
"No, not really."  
"Well, neither do I."  
"Fine." Jack stamped off and found Ragetti still in the cell. He and Pintel were arguing over which crate best suits a fire pit.  
"I think that met-al crate will do jus' fine," Ragetti said, even his fake eye fixated on Pintel.  
"An' I think that it won' hold nuffin'! We need somethin' bigger," Pintel said snarling.  
"Shut up, the both o' you!" Jack said. The two stopped dead with what they were doing. "Just give me the bloody crate. I'll do the rest."  
"Yes, sir, Cap'n Sparrow," Ragetti said nervously. "We didn't mean nuffin' by arguin'."  
"You two never do," Jack said quietly and walked back to the galley.

Elizabeth was gutting fish. Her brow a little sweaty, her hands dirty and fish heads and bones scattered on the floor by her feet. "Now there's a sight for sore eyes," Jack teased. Elizabeth looked up and smiled. "Did you get help?"  
"I don't need those idiots' help. I've got it."  
"Fine."

The two were working on their separate projects. Jack had a nice fire going over the broken stove, and Elizabeth finished gutting the fish. Her hands were sore and her mouth dry. _Bloody pirates. Never lending a helping hand for anyone._ Jack saw that she was through and began helping her dump the fish into the fire. They sat down on the floor on the other side of the galley, exhausted from the hard work. Pintel and Ragetti were doing a dance with Marty while Gibbs continued to steer outside. The men never needed help entertaining themselves. Elizabeth was humming along to the strange song the men were singing and Jack joined in. They both looked over at one another and started laughing. "A pirate's life for me," Jack sang softly. Elizabeth sighed. "Do I just take your breath away?"  
"You wish," Elizabeth scoffed, "I am just tired."  
"Me too, love. The fish are burning nicely."  
"Oh yes. It would look delicious if I hadn't been the one to gut the fish."  
"Well maybe if you were a bit kinder to your cap'n I wouldn't 'ave put you up to it."  
"Me?"  
"Yes you!"  
"I was kind."  
"You challenged me. And challenging a cap'n does not lead to pleasant results. I am sure poor William is figurin' that out right now." Jack said, looking at her inquisitively. Elizabeth made eye contact and they looked at each other for close to thirty seconds. Finally Miss Swann pulled her eyes away and rested her head against the wall behind them. Jack put his hand on her knee. She sighed, but tried to ignore the touch. "Y'know, Elizabeth, we only 'ave a small amount of time before the Pearl reaches the Dutchman, an' you will be wiff your love." He leaned in closer to her ear. "But what are you going to do if we can't save 'im?" He continued to sit dangerously close to her. Elizabeth rolled her eyes and looked at him again.  
"I am sorry, Captain Sparrow, but I do not believe that this is very appropriate conversation to be having with a lady of my social standing."  
"You've been meddlin' with pirates. You 'ave no social standings anymore, dear." Jack said smirking. Elizabeth could not look away. _Look away. Look away. Look away._ She could not fight the urge, but Jack, knowing he had won, was satisfied for now. He sat back in his original position. "You're startin' to become more like us, Miss Swann."  
"And what makes you say that?" Elizabeth felt a tinge of spite.  
"You can't be trusted."  
"Excuse me?" She became even more offended. Jack Sparrow merely yelled from his seat out to the crew that it was time to eat. He rested his head against the wall and pulled his hat over his eyes. "Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me," he sang gently with a chuckle.


End file.
